"Yes,  Berr,  glad to see you.
Your  commander  just  radioed
the  message.  I'm  sorry  you
had to come all  this way  for
nothing,  but...  wait.  Would
you  accept  a  gift  for your
troubles?"

"Yes.   I  would  be  honored,
your nobleness."

"All right,  then.  Here's  my
daughter.  Take  care  of  her
well. I pronounce you married.
Now, go."

"But, Sire..."

"Do you not  find her  beauti-
ful?"

"Yes, but-"

"Then take her. I will take it
as an insult if you don't. You
are dismissed."

         *    *    *

"Well,  what do we have here?"

"Shut up,  brachly.  That goes
for the rest of you, too!"

"Branlinch yawna heal?"

"You'd think  that if her  fa-
ther knew english, he'd  teach
it to her, too."

"Listen,  Jacko,  you'd better
find something on the ship for
her to wear before we get back
to  Earth.   Getting  arrested
isn't the best welcome America
could have for the first black
elf on the planet."

"Yeah...  Why  doesn't  anyone
wear any clothes on that plan-
et, anyway?"

"The climate. They never need-
ed any,  so  they didn't  make
'em."

"Yan,  Tortleness!   Sweentoo,
Sweeeentoo."

"She   sure  is  affectionate,
though.  Why  didn't  he  even
tell me her name?"

"Maybe she  doesn't have one."

"Yeah, sure!"

"Gweend Node!"

"What?"

"Gweend Node! Gweend Node! Har
flornsnart"

"Green Nose?"

"Fek, Fek!"

"I guess it must be Wind Note,
then."

"What'll I tell Jane? That the
king of the  Naquru forced  me
to marry a black elf, instead?
I mean, REALLY!"

"Yeah...  She was  mad  enough
that  you had  to  go on  this
mission."

"Well, what do I do with her?"

"You'll  have  to figure  that
one out for yourself."

          THE END....